a lift of Denise's dear Valentine LO

Credits:
SewNon Alpha by Stolen Moments
Studio 365 Flecked Solid Papers, Striped Papers, Mix-ins and Tidbits by Elise's Pieces Designs

Journaling:
I can remember when my kids were very young. Having 4 children under the age of six and the busy-ness and hustle and bustle of our home. The effort it took to get them all to church on time. How I’d crash into bed after a full day of chasing toddlers and babies.
I would hear all the time “It may be tough right now but it will be over before you know it.” Well, I never thought it seemed all that tough. In fact, I liked it.
Sure there were times when I’d get a little overwhelmed with my never-ending duties.
Every mom feels taken for granted from time to time.
But I seriously loved our little family. We had great children who not only the grandparents
Loved to be around, but people outside our family as well. Tim & I raised some really fantastic kids and I have always made it my purpose to enjoy every bit of their growing up and never to wish for them to be older or passed certain stages. Every year would just get better and better.
Fast forward to today…
The kids are now 16, 14, 12 and 10.
And here’s My Dilemma
I need them to stopping growing now!! I want to freeze time. Seriously, stop everything right here. Don’t get me wrong, I love the young people they have become. And I still really enjoy them. It’s so nice to see all our hard work pay off. But I’m not ready to let go!
Now this may seem pre-mature. Spencer is only 16, right? But this year, he got his driver’s license, Put together his college portfolio and even visited the college he wants to attend next year. Next year??? That’s too soon!
I don’t know why this is affecting me the way it has but every time I think about him leaving
My heart starts breaking a little. I know Zach isn’t far behind. He’s got his sights set on Stanford and is working on those grades and
extra curricular activities to boost up his college resume. The girls are becoming young women and I feel like I’m losing my little family.
It’s the first time in my years of motherhood
That I am struggling with enjoying today. I keep thinking about this time next year and
knowing we’ll be saying goodbye to one of our kids. Each and everyone of them brings such a unique dynamic to our family and I can’t imagine any of them gone.
So, maybe I got it wrong all those years ago.
I took that advice to mean that I shouldn’t wish for those times to be over too quickly, but to cherish them. That part was easy for me. The part I need to work on now is enjoying today without the anxiety of what might happen tomorrow. Or next year. Or the year after. It’s inevitable that our children will grow older and leave the home. I just need to rest in the fact that they’ll always love me, I’ll always be their mom, and they’ll always
be in my life. If it were only that easy.