10/05/09 Word Up Challenge

This was a really tough challenge for me, but after much deliberation I finally decided to scrap about the challenges I am facing right now instead of the wonderful and happy stuff. :smile:

Credits:
NEW release - Everyday Thanks from Plum Dumpling Designs
Font - DJB AngelBaby from Darcy Baldwin

Disclaimer: I am a CT member for Plum Dumpling Designs. As a CT member I receive product for free in return for creating and posting projects.

Journaling reads:
Today is a NEW DAY and I have decided that I can not keep looking back on yesterday, last week, last month, or last year. What happened on each of those days can not effect or control what happens in the present. I have so much to be thankful for - the most wonderful and loving daughter, a supportive extended family, and more important than anything is my faith in the Lord. I really don't know which of these has given me the most comfort and support lately and truth be told, it was probably a combination of all of them.

Although I am not looking back on the past, I know that it is good to get some of the feelings and emotions out so that I can hopefully look back to this and see how far I have come. There are so many feelings stuck inside that I don't even know where to begin - hurt, anger, lack of trust, doubt, and uncertainty just to name a few. Looking back, I realize this problem has been building for many years and all I was doing was allowing it to continue. My denial of the problem was just a show for the world that "our life was great" when in actuality it was really just a lie. However, admitting that (at the time) would have been admitting failure. Now I realize that I don't have to stand up in front on the world and say there is a problem. I have found a wonderful support group full of people just like me that have been through experiences just like mine. They have made it through and are survivors and that will be me! Will it be tomorrow, next week, next month, next year? That is a question that I can not answer. I do know that RIGHT NOW I can do it one day at a time.