Happy “What Matters” Monday to you, fellow ScrapMatters enthusiasts! Heather (hedderlee) here. One of my favorite pastimes as a young girl was hanging out at the local Hallmark store and perusing the boxed card section, and I poured over those cards for hours on end. Fast forward 20 years or so… I started digital scrapbooking last October, and I’ve been blissfully churning out my own designs similar to ones I saw during my Hallmark store wanderings! I have established myself as the resident family historian, with camera in tow to every single event, slowing down the internet connection due to all the downloading of digital products and freebies (hoard city), and having to buy more hard drive space to accomodate my insatiable need for more. It’s a happy illness!!!
There is a rather dark side to my newfound hobby – I am obsessed. I guess I really should have started out this post with right hand over heart, saying, “Hello, I’m Heather, and I’m a digi scrapbooking addict.” I have a rather all-or-none Type A+ personality, so I throw myself into what is set before me. But time-consuming addictions and being a wife, mother of two girls, and working don’t quite mesh well… at least I don’t juggle these roles well, leaving me a “master of none”. There have been moments (oh heck, days) when my five-year-old would tap me on the shoulder and tell me her stomach hurt because she needed to eat breakfast… I look over at the clock and it blinks accusingly at me: 11:30am. And the one-year-old’s diaper is so full that she’s at least ten pounds heavier. I know, I know. Before you call Child Protective Services on me, please know that I’ve been reevaluating my neglectful behaviors and am no longer doing them! I love my girls more than life itself. But then I’m left throwing wistful, furtive glances at my laptop, wishing I could immerse myself in Photoshop’s dreamy world… just one minute. Enter guilt, resentment, a general feeling of unfulfillment –
Dove Chocolate recently conducted a survey that found that 37 percent of women never make time to do anything special for themselves. That number increased to 46 percent for women with children. Yikes! Do we really need to completely deny ourselves to be good wives and mothers? Those numbers seem grim to me. Where can I find the happy land of Balance, where I dance with blithe joy, digi scrapping in one hand and my well-adjusted and well-fed family on the other?
I bet you’re yelling at your computer screen, “Heather, it really comes down to keeping things in perspective!” I think I’m figuring that out myself. Here’s a list of thoughts that have helped center me a bit:
Credits - Britt-ish Designs’ Dreams Do Come True Kit, Fonts: Century Gothic, 2Peas Stop Sign
- Build scrapping into your schedule - Make an appointment with yourself and scrap as if it is a part of your daily work. I found this to be effective with exercising too.
- Set a time limit and stick to it– I use the timer on my microwave. That way, when I tell my kids half an hour, they know I keep my word. And really, you can do a pretty good layout in that time. Or work in installments.
- Be realistic about your life situation and work within its confines – I have two little children, and I want so much for them to be the best people God has meant for them to be. The first five years of a child’s life is crucial to optimum brain development, and it’s not the time for me to slack as a mother. Little kids will turn into teens, then adults that leave the house. Don’t want to miss any of it.
- Don’t burn the midnight oil– The result of doing so? Illnesses, bags under the eyes, poor skin, mental fog, crabbiness, my ugly side rearing its huge head. You get the idea.
- Involve the children; have them color next to you – Arm yourself with play dough and accessories, markers and coloring books, or even blocks so that your children feel a part of your life. My five-year-old loves Wedgits.
- Spend some alone time to build up your hobby – Your family gets it: you’re happiest when you emerge with a layout from some mind melding time with the computer. Let them know you’ll need Saturday afternoon for x amount of hours. A happy mom is a happy family!
- Print out your layouts so you can enjoy them every moment you get– My goal is to have them hang all about the house, like artwork.
- Spend less time meandering the cyberwaves and scrap away– I can blog hop randomly until the cows come home. There goes precious time.
- Concentrate on making memories, not just scrapping them– Boy, does this one speak volumes to me.
- Be aware of all your life’s blessings– When I do, I’m more apt to strike a good balance with my day.
So, my friends, I share my weakness with you in hopes that someone will benefit from my journey. I’d love to hear some ways you keep a good balance in your life – I’m still learning. 
16 responses so far ↓
1 designerbrittney // Mar 31, 2008 at 1:30 pm
Thank you Heather Lee for writing such an honest article. I think we can all relate and finding balance is a real struggle for me. I love to hear that I’m not alone!
2 Linz // Mar 31, 2008 at 3:06 pm
I thought i was reading about myself except my kids are old enuff to make their own dinner. My husband and I are both absolutely obsessive types. He is doing home brewing at the moment and i am scrapbooking my heart out. Frequently way past midnight!
But i was interested in your comment about women not taking time to do anything for themselves. in my job i talk to lots of women and for many the start of their maternity leave is the start of weeks of absolute boredom. They have No hobbies, No friends except ones who work.
I am glad i have a hobby… well actually lots of hobbies (just anything creative really)!
3 Sya // Mar 31, 2008 at 4:41 pm
lovely write up heather!!
4 Happy Scrap Girl // Mar 31, 2008 at 4:58 pm
Heather - I so needed this article today. I had such a bad day with my children - they are not feeling well, and mom is more than a bit grumpy (hey, I peed on and thrown up on in the same DAY!) This really put things into perspective for me - finding balance, time for me and time for them. Thank you so much for that. I’d actually like to print your list and hang it on my desk
THANK YOU
5 Happy Scrap Girl // Mar 31, 2008 at 6:01 pm
Oh boy, I ment to say GOT peed on (I did NOT pee on anyone I swear
)
6 SarahK // Mar 31, 2008 at 6:15 pm
needed this today - hubby doesn’t get how much I “need” this hobby, but it’s the one thing I truly feel is for me and no one else - at least not until later when they’ll appreciate what I’ve created.
7 Shari // Mar 31, 2008 at 6:36 pm
Hi my name is Shari and I am a digi scrapping addict. I guess if we are spilling our guts here I might as well jump in.
I can so relate to this article. I feel guilty every day for the time I spend on the computer. If guilt is involved it must be way too much time. 
My children are pretty self sufficient, heck even my four year old knows where the granola bars are so he aint starving but I totally agree about prioritizing and keeping a proper perspective. I need to practice that. Great article. You are not alone. 
8 Tater // Mar 31, 2008 at 7:16 pm
Heather…I swear your writing about me! What a great article and great reminder to stay balanced!
9 Teresa P // Mar 31, 2008 at 7:39 pm
so true! Thank you!
10 sassypixie323 // Mar 31, 2008 at 9:12 pm
Sounds way too familiar! Have you ever hit sleep on your laptop the minute you hear the garage door open???LOL! I don’t think husbands will ever understand that this is not just a hobby but something that makes us feel good about ourselves!!! Great post Heather! Happy, you crack me up!!!
11 Zakirah // Mar 31, 2008 at 9:54 pm
Except for the kids part, I can totally relate myself with this. I’m a student and I think I’m too obsessed with scrapping that I put my assignments aside for scrapping! That’s bad, I know. I want to change. I want to slow down this obsession, have fun, balance my life and a have a really good time while surfing in the digi world (and not being overwhelmed!). Thanks for the honest article, I need to check myself now!
12 Leah // Apr 1, 2008 at 7:21 am
Heather, thank you for your honest post. I know I am obsessed. There are days when my 4 year old comes in and begs me to get off the computer…now that is obsession. I really need balance and order in my life. Thank you for being so open and for helping me see that I need to set some boundaries and priorities but all the while setting some me time too…Thank you so much!!!!
13 Melissa // Apr 1, 2008 at 10:58 am
Crap! It’s like you’re looking into my life! My girls are the reason I got into digi-scrapbooking to begin with and now I’m at the computer rather than spending time with them. I only discovered digi-scrapping a couple months ago but it’s so addictive and the designers with their freebies are like crack dealers! Don’t get me wrong ~ loving the freebies, but I need some control before I fill up my new external hard drive! That and my husband’s getting ticked off about all the dishes in the sink.
14 inspirecj // Apr 1, 2008 at 12:41 pm
I needed this! PERSPECTIVE! Thanks so much! I’m glad to know I’m not the only one with a “problem”, and to think, there is a way out from the addiction! LOL!
15 Shari // Apr 1, 2008 at 1:00 pm
I so agree. I have started cutting back my time on the computer because of the behavior change I had seen in my children. My two girls (6 and 4 1/2) started asking to play on the computer too. Now if we had some games and a great computer for them to play on, it would be different. Along with them sharing it just fine.
16 Janine // Apr 6, 2008 at 10:53 am
Hi, I’m Janine, and I’m addicted…oh, SO glad I’m not the only one. I can so relate to the days when I was getting peed on, as well as the panic of hearing the garage door go up! Ah sisters-in-cyberworld digital…bless you. I have to confess I’m not looking for a 12 step program though!
Leave a Comment